“You’ve had first days before”

This was what my friend said to me on the night before my first day at work back in April. This is the second job I’ve started since I started I came to university, the other being Twickenham Stadium, where I have worked since March (and I will probably blog about that at some point!) Anyway, I can’t say too much about where I work and what I do because of the social media policy of the company, but I will try hard to give a sense of what I wanted to talk about regarding the above quote.

Due to acceptable reasons, I only started the job on a Wednesday in late April, despite being interviewed in January, and I had also had no training. I should say straight off that once I got to work I was trained on the job and that this was the best way to learn my role anyway.

Going back to that Tuesday night, the lack of training and awareness of my job role (I can’t even describe it myself so that’s understandable!) led to a fair degree of anxiety. My shift started at 8:30 so I needed to leave my flat around 7am, catch the 7:27 train, then figure out a way up to my actual place of work. In actual fact I got to the train station so early that I stuck around and read a little bit of my book (Us by David Nicholls, see my last post for more on that). I then got to the staff check in and had no idea where to go. The team I was working for was very small so they had no record of me, but I eventually found the correct person; picked up my staff wristband, an empty bag for the cash I didn’t have on me, and my lunch and was taken down to the office I was working in.

Everyone was lovely, the work was fun, free food was in abundance. On one of my breaks we had a walk around the area. The end of the day was quite frantic, but I made it out in one piece, feeling happy, and with an expenses claim for my train fare and the knowledge that I was going to be paid a fair bit of money.

Yes, I had no reason to be anxious, but the idea that because I’ve had first days before I should not be nervous can never work on me. Each time I go into a different environment I am apprehensive. I don’t know what to expect and I can’t create a picture in my mind of what it’s going to be like. This is something I still struggle with every day I work at Twickenham because it is always a different role in a different place with a different team. I expect it will be something I will struggle with next time I’m at this place of work because I’ve had a long break between work days. But I know that ultimately I will get through it, and always have the same feeling that I don’t need to be anxious at the end of the day.

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